It seems these days that anyone and no one can get through their lives without anything holding them back. Everyone depends upon excuses; my family, my friends, my partner, my diagnosis, my pills, my aspirations, my education – everything is the thing that has let you down, everything apart from yourself. There is never an acceptance of personal failure, the blame and wrong doing can always be pushed to someone else, when will we come to the self realisation of not being perfect and accept that every one of us has flaws. Even those that can accept this create an illusion of confronting flaws and dealing with them; how can you deal with something that you are programmed to have; there is an obsession with becoming the best we can be, the greatest at something, of showing everyone else how fantastic you have become in comparison with them. Why? What self belief can this create; it might boost the egos of few, but diminishes the goals of others. No longer can we strive to be what our own mind begs us to be, we become what those see us as; what our social actions and physical attributes determine us to be. Where have the young children gone who longed to be cared for and who longed to be the greatest and do whatever they may please; they have become lost in the whirlwind of adolescence and the depressing views of never achieving or amounting to anything.
Ever the optimists of the twenty first century, the sarcastic days of childhood have become clouded with questions of life, with the subtle answering of death and immortality. With the evaporation of younger care free days, naivety has been lost and imagination burnt. It seems as though it’s all about growing up fast, the faster the better, the sooner you can be perceived to drink, smoke and do all that, the better person you are. Who judges these people? Themselves, their peers, their parents, and the random people in the street they pass every day? Who are they judged against? Themselves, their peers, their parents, and the random people in the street they pass every day? All life appears to be for the young, is a show, a trial and fail, just a constant battering of self-esteem. Is it any wonder that all they can think of is how they can produce a better them, produce a better fake reality for themselves.
Maybe that is all just a bit negative
Maybe, just maybe, this is the wrong perception; maybe all the people who don’t know who they are, do know who they are, maybe it’s a facade of confusion they present us with, but in reality they do know who they are, they just don’t like it. Who would, if everyone knew who they really were, there would be no need for conversation, no need for trial and error, no need for education- because you’d know everything you wanted to know, everything you needed to know to be yourself.
It’s too hard to be yourself when you are young, everyone else appears to know what they want and who they are; then you get close to someone and you realise they are as scared and as nervous as you are about the rest of their life. Yes okay some people find it harder, and some people do seem to deal with it better but still they don’t know any more than you. They may appear more intellectual and positive but the future for them is just as unclear as yours.